It’s enough to make you reach for a drink (or a smoke…) !

Weston's Scrumpy !Here I am, bothering nobody, and the Nanny State is at it again. Now they’re targeting middle-aged drinkers. (well, OK, I’m middle-to-old-age…)

You might have noticed one of my favourite tipples on the right… Comes with a very useful (yawn !) label indicating that a) the flagon contains 15 units of alcohol, and b) that the contents must be consumed within five days…..

Well now, there’s a dilemna, our lovely Nanny State decrees that three units of alcohol a day is enough for anyone – over that and you become a risk to yourself, and a burden on the State. Ah, is that why alcoholics get more Income Support than ‘relatively sober’ claimants, to cover the cost of the extra booze ?

So – anyway – is this ALL I can drink over a five day period ? It’s enough to make me start smoking my pipe again ! Which I probably will do, on the first of July, when a ‘smoking in public places’ ban comes into place (with emphasis on the ‘pub’ in ‘public’…).

I, for one, totally acknowledge the right to not breathe in stale cancerous cigarette smoke, but moving all the smokers onto pavements – where they can breathe in even more cancerous exhaust fumes as well – isn’t exactly a productive move.

“Power to the People” I say ! Leave us alone…..

The government is just a bunch of hypocrites anyway – they certainly don’t want to lose the tax/duty they charge on alcohol/tobacco/fuel ! That’d mean there wouldn’t be enough money to keep our lads in Iraq and Afghanistan……

This entry was posted in Dorset life, Humour & Techie. Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to It’s enough to make you reach for a drink (or a smoke…) !

  1. Sam ie says:

    Here in Ireland we’ve had the smoking ban in pubs for a few years now, and it’s actually worked out quite well. They’ve had to provide semi-outdoor smoking rooms, and also patio heaters. Patio heaters are, incidentally, one of the most inefficient and polluting gas-burning appliances around. So this smoking ban, while having a positive effect on the pub, will have terrible effect on the environment.

  2. al says:

    Sam – Yes, I expect there are soon going to be a lot of ‘temporary, neither indoors nor outdoors’ constructions testing both the smoking and building laws, over here. As the ban is coming in right at the start of the holiday season, families will probably have a hard time finding empty tables in the beer gardens – they’ll be full of smokers !

    In reality, most of the pubs here have already sensibly segregated into ‘smoking, non-food’ bars, and ‘non-smoking food/kids bars’ – which is what the legislation was going to be before it went extreme.

    I wonder if the open ‘River Terrace Bars’ at the Houses of Parliament in London are going to be packed with exiled smoking MP’s ? Or will they invoke ‘Parliamentary privilege’ and smoke inside ? I very much suspect the latter……..

    By the way, welcome..

  3. Owen, 'the other viewer' says:

    As a lifelong Teetotaler/non-smoker i don’t think I can comment…

  4. al says:

    Owen, is that old ‘saying’ true then ? You know, the one about “So when you get up in the morning, that’s the best you’re going to feel all day” ?

  5. Lewis Pelham says:

    Just how long do these meddling, interfering, holier than thou, do- gooders think they will live anyway?…Probably three years longer than a forty-a-day man. The ultimate irony is a proposal by the NHS to refuse treatment to the “self harming” smoker whilst being aware that tobacco duty pays for the NHS and that (they say) smokers die young and therefore are a reduced burden on the NHS….what a smug load of bastards.
    We are told that salt is bad for us. Please therefore explain my mother, who, at 102 years old, lives alone and is fit, yet she has always eaten virtually her body weight in salt every month. Surely it is all down to genes. Hopefully she has passed them on….my brother, hale and hearty at 69, has one kidney yet drinks two bottles of wine and half a bottle of brandy every day.
    Christ I loath politicians, from the interfering clowns in Westminster down to the entry level examples in Local Government. Ggggrrrr!

  6. al says:

    I see the local pub has just started building an “outside-inside” smoking room – “Ooops” – can’t call it a room because it’s open air ! Except that it’s got a roof, and a floor, and doors, and a wall or three…… Hmmmmm.

    So it’s an ‘enclosed/roofed patio-garden’ ? Yes……….. I hope he puts in separate tills, or has some way of working out how much money comes from the new room, because I know how much profit will come from the inside/outside smokers non-room. The old bar is going to be a great place for ‘being alone’

    On a large, relatively “well-heeled” retiree estate like mine (not that I’m rich), how do you tell smokers in their 60’s and 70’s that it’s bad for them ? There’s a tradition amongst men of a certain age, to have a regular ‘fag’ at the boozer – even to the extent that (being banned at home) they leave their fags on a shelf behind the bar at their local. They were the generation that was brainwashed into smoking anyway.

    On a slightly different topic, Ms. Flint, from the Ministry of Killjoy’s, was recently proclaiming on the news that ” pub/bar wine glasses have gone up in size to 200ml or even 250ml – that’s almost half a bottle of wine in a glass !” Nope, 250ml is EXACTLY a third of a standard 750 ml. bottle – if Ministers who want to ‘nanny’ us can’t be bothered to be accurate, who will give them any credibility ? As if the people who drink/smoke to real excess will take any notice anyway ?

  7. Owen, 'the other viewer' says:

    I hate it when people round things up to halfs if they’re greater than 2.5, it would be much better to say 1/4 or 1/3.

    Lewis, I have to say that i agree with you about politicians. Also the NHS’ function is to provide free healthcare for the population of britain. evidently smokers are no longer people…

    Oh, and Alan, I always feel awful in the morning, only really wake up after my first mug of orange juice 😉

  8. Lewis Pelham says:

    Another pet hate, while we are on the subject, is the decline of the language. What is 24/7?…do they mean at all times? Why, these days is no-one shot?…gunned down…Uuuggggh. Were I a newsreader I could not use these expressions. Why also is the word less used as a substitute for fewer?
    Owen… Orange Juice; how very healthy; my heart starter is a deliciously poisonous espresso…nothing happens before that.

  9. al says:

    Recently I had to take my ‘ex’ to Bournemouth Hospital for some day treatment, and so I waited on one of the outside benches with the dog, who really shouldn’t have been on hospital premises (so tell that to the ‘norwalk’, or ‘C difficile.’ viruses, and leave the dog alone – she hasn’t killed anyone, and she’s clean…….)

    Out of the many many smokers who joined me on the bench, most to have a theraputic snuggle with Ace (who doesn’t mind anyone as long as they make a fuss of her), a rough survey showed – about 20% were visitors, 30% patients (one complete with unplugged heart monitor on a trolley, and several with portable drips) and 50% staff – including nurses and doctors… Most of them regailed me with the woeful tale – “next week we’ll be smoking outside the gate, on the verge of the dual carriageway, when all smoking is banned on NHS premises”.

    Sigh…. There must be something in that lot about “getting the priorities right ?”

    Owen – are you decaffeinated as well ? Next you’ll be extolling the virtues of vegan’ism….

  10. al says:

    Lewis – when I worked in Italy, breakfast was always accompanied by “Cafe Correcto” – although I always opted for a slug of Cognac in the death-wish expresso, as opposed to the de-facto local Grappa !

    Disgusting habit I know, but I learnt it in Germany, where it was called “Kaffee mit Cognac”. Tuetonic efficiency was often fired up by a ‘shot’ at breakfast, they may have worked hard, but they played even harder….

    When I was born again as a computer engineer, I once made a memorable dawn flight to Copenhagen. Short flight – no sooner does the plane finish climbing than it normally starts descending again. The steward(esse)s really only have time for serving coffee, and my request for a complimentary miniature cognac ‘in it’ was rewarded with a knowing smile and a very warming drink !

    Things got out of hand however, as more and more passengers latched onto the idea. By the time we landed, I think all options had been exhausted except maybe gin and advocaat/advokatt in the coffee….. We should maybe have been in the Guinness Book of Records (a very appropriate name) for record consumption of booze on a plane before sunrise. The one time when British Airways coffee was drinkable. Early flying was never quite the same again for a lot of us, in fact BA never banned it – which I’d thought they subsequently would have…..

    Ah, memories…..

  11. Owen, 'the other viewer' says:

    I’m afraid that I am also decaffinated, except for Chocolate of course.

    Nope, it’s Orange juice through and through for me 🙂

  12. al says:

    Owen – I used to work for a Mormon Bishop, who (by virtue of his religion) avoided stimulants like tea/coffee/alcohol/tobacco – his few vices included huge mugs of drinking chocolate seemingly always on his desk….. Needless to say, he was not slim – and constantly trying to find an interesting range of unusual ‘soft’ drinks for his many social events.

  13. Owen, 'the other viewer' says:

    St Clements has always worked for me, Orange juice and bitter lemon: delicious, and found in almost every pub in the country, even if you do have to explain how to make it… 🙂

  14. Lewis Pelham says:

    Alan…..”I used to work for a Mormon Bishop”…..WHAT!!!! The mind boggles.
    I guess that, to be pedantic, food and air are stimulants….not much stimulation without them.
    Time for my morning espresso…thanks to Alan’s reminder of “cafe correcto” I will pull it into a large vodka this morning!

  15. Lewis Pelham says:

    Alan….I do hope that you were not employed to polish his cassock! :-0

  16. al says:

    Lewis – Noooooo, he was my technical director in the first computer company I went to work for. His motto was “no place for religion in business” – very shrewd man. A lot of US computer companies had religious connections, nothing ungodly about making money !

Please feel free to Comment ( your very first comment will be moderated...)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s